The Levite and His Concubine - Sometimes it's just too late to say you're sorry

It's like Bible Study with a smaller time commitment

So this Levite (member of tribe of Levi) had this hot young concubine. But she wasn't fond of the guy (who was probably beating her) so she took off and went back to her dad's place to hide out (according to the bible this makes her a whore). After four months our good Levite friend bought a dozen roses and a box of chocolates and took a trip to the dad's place. He got there, told the girl he was sorry and he just wasn't himself that night he beat her, and would never hit her again.

So concubine forgives the douchbag and they hang out at her dad's place for a few days. Then dad and concubine keep tricking douchbag into staying longer, but finally douchbag gets sick of it and leaves for home in the middle of the afternoon. They can't finish the trip in just a few hours so they get a room in the town if Gibeah which was under the management of the tribe of benjamin. Naturally a mob formed to try to rape douchbag (as tends to happen in the bible), but the owner of the B&B told the mob to take his virgin daughter and the concubine instead. So the mob took the concubine (but not the daughter) and gang raped her until morning, when she was able to crawl back to the door of the B&B before dying.

Douchbag wakes up in the morning, figures out what happened and takes his dead concubine back to his house where he chops her up into pieces and sends them out the leadership of the 12 tribes of Isreal. So they had a war conference and decided to kill everyone from the tribe of Benjamin. They attacked and killed all the men (600 of them escaped into the winderness) and all the cattle. They burned down all the buildings. Then they killed all the women and children.

After the war someone figured out that nobody from Jabesh-Gilead helped wipe out the Tribe of Benjamin, so the Israelites went and destroyed that city too, killing everyone but the virgin women which they could take home with them for later use.

After the tribe of Benajmin was nearly obliderated because the Levite douchbag's concubine was raped to death, the the old israelites got together and decided it was bad kharma to commit genocide against their relatives. To fix things they decided the Benjaminites needed wives. This was going to be tricky because they Benjaminite women had all been put to the sword and they didn't want them to hook up with any Israeli women.

It was eventually decided that the surviving Bejaminites should kidnap a bunch of women from a neighboring country. They did this and moved back to their burned out cities and fixed them up. Yay!




The artist says the woman in the middle is duct taped to a donkey and is not screaming like the
other two because her mouth is also duct taped. This seems highly accurate to me. I mean,
why carry the woman you are kidnapping when you can just strap her to a donkey?


Ref: Judges chapters 19, 20, and 21